To Catch a Thought

Between the stresses of our jobs, family and community, it can be pretty challenging to set aside time for a daily meditation practice. Instead of setting aside this time, turn your time into a meditative exercise.

Daily activities like washing the dishes and folding the laundry can take on new meaning when done mindfully. Find an activity that must get done on a day to day basis, perhaps we’d even call it a chore. The next time we need to do this, let’s try as best as possible to focus on what it is we are doing, as we are doing it, even if it seems mundane, boring and tedious. See if we can approach this activity as if it were the first time doing it. Let’s take washing dishes as an example. What do the dishes/ soap feel like? What is the sensation of warm water? Noticing and acknowledging sensations, feelings and thoughts when doing any chore is a mindfulness practice. We may also start to notice that we get distracted by thoughts. Let’s simply catch these thoughts, and gently and with compassion, redirect our attention back to our activity.

Practicing mindfulness is a great way to drop in on our thoughts, feelings and bodies. It helps us to better understand who we are as individuals. So let’s turn our chores into something more! Wherever and whatever we are doing, let’s see if we can do it mindfully!

The Escape Artist

We often times seek distractions in life to escape from our daily grind or from something challenging.  Escaping can take on many forms such as checking our phones or Facebook, watching TV, or even eating foods that do not nurture us. It is so commonplace that most of us don’t even realize that we are doing it.

Escaping reality isn’t always a bad thing. We all need to escape sometimes and this is heathy. Escaping with a distraction helps us to temporarily put a daunting challenge on hold. Distractions can bring us comfort and delight and may lead to experiences that can transform us as individuals.

What happens, however, when we misuse distractions? Distractions can sometimes facilitate procrastination or can lead us to avoid experiencing life. When we avoid life’s challenges, we often find it reappears and rears its nasty head again, sometimes it develops a second head and becomes some sort of two headed monster. Sometimes we even live in order to escape. These types of distractions detract from our ability to live life in a full and wholesome way.

Facing the present realities, the full gamut of the good and bad in our lives can be quite enriching. Experiencing reality can mean embracing the uncomfortable things that make us anxious. But what a thrill to embrace the full experience of life. There becomes a joy in meeting life in all its glory.

Living in the present moment, is a practice that does get easier with time, dedication and motivation. We will always have things begging for our escaping the present. So how can we stay in the present and not get lost? First, recognize when we want the distraction. Are there specific stimuli that seem to take us away from the present moment? Acknowledge these cues and try better to understand them. Then allow yourself to embrace the present instead.

While escapism offers a quick patched up fix, mindfulness offers us the ability to be brave warriors. Realize your own strength! Face your demons. Don’t forget that the next time that tempting distraction appears to offer its goodies. Take a deep breath and own the awareness that the realities of life may just offer you something even more thrilling.

 

Confessions of a Supermarkaholic…

Beets. They are so great for you, loaded with vitamins and minerals, and yet they are so uninviting with their tough outside coats. On a recent supermarket expedition, I decided that beets would be my new frontier! Purchased one, put it in the vege bin and then forgot about it (it was hidden beneath a yellow pepper). Luckily, root vegetables last for a while.  I won’t mention how much time had passed, but decided that today is this hardy vege’s day! With a little patience, 30 minutes of boiling it in a pot full of hot water, I very much enjoyed eating this root vegetable.  In fact, beet red may just be my new favorite color!

Fallen Off the Wagon?

Embarking on a wellness journey is never easy. At some point along the way, we inevitably meet with new or old challenges that pose obstacles to our new wellness paths.

Sometimes we even fall off the wagon and go back to unhealthy patterns. That is normal and to be expected, us being human and all. When it does happen, we need to ask ourselves how do we now respond.

Our instincts may take on the unfortunate route of punishment. Often without thinking, we do what we know from childhood. We did something “wrong” and therefore are deserving of punishment or criticism. While it may or may not have worked then, we need to question if this really works for us now.

In place of the “punish” I would like to suggest lavish! Lavish yourself with compassion and every kind of healthy treat. Go to an extra yoga class, get a massage, treat yourself to more meditation time, buy a new tasty fruit or tea. Why? When we meet our hardships with compassion, space for good things opens up.

With that space, we can often become creative problem solvers and thinkers. How to make our new wellness paths work well despite our challenges? This question often requires creative solutions. Space creates a new energy that actually enables us to move forward.

Punishment, however, has a tendency to breed more punishment, more pressure, more ruminating thoughts. It creates confinement, often bringing us further away from our wellness paths. It prevents us from feeling good enough to proceed. Usually it results in us getting further away from where we are seeking to go.

Falling off the wagon is never the issue. It is what we do next, that matters. Remember to lavish with compassion and before you know it, you will feel the energy you need to pick yourself up and get to it once again!

Restartwell is coming to Hebrew University!

Please join us November 25th at 8:30 pm for,

“Living in the Moment: An Introduction to Mindfulness”

For more details and to register please contact me at restartwell@gmail.com.

Goal Dream

“I want to be the Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.” “I want to become a billionaire.” “I want to look like a supermodel.”

Now, I am not against shooting for the stars, but let’s face it, we can get stuck sometimes when we create goals that are just a tad too lofty.

Perhaps a better approach is to ask ourselves, what is it that we wanted from our goals?

The best way to set attainable goals is to ask ourselves what we had hoped to gain from these lofty goals. Were we seeking empowerment? More confidence? More love? Feeling great about our bodies?

Becoming aware of these intended consequences can provide us with a greater understanding of what we are actually seeking in our lives.  With this greater understanding we are able to then set goals that are not only more realistic but that will also provide us with what we really want out of life.

How do we discover what our true intentions are behind a goal? First, imagine what would happen when achieving that goal. What does that look like and see if it can be described as best as is possible.

We can then chose to do activities that bring us closer to those descriptions. Achieving even smaller career successes can feel empowering. Earning a decent salary but having free time for ourselves can make us happier than earning millions. Exercising and eating right can bring us closer to feeling great about our bodies.

So figure out what it is that you truly seek. Usually it is more accessible than what you originally imagined.

Serenity Now

Sometimes we wish we could experience more control over certain situations.  We often say to ourselves, “If only this person could change in this way, my life would be a lot easier.” “If I were no longer in this situation I would be so much happier.” We seem to feel that control over everything is the key to serenity.

Dejection unfortunately reigns when we try to control the areas of our lives that we simply have no control over. There will always be situations where control is not possible.  Relinquishing control and accepting what is sometimes gives us even more power. It ennobles us to act in new ways, more productive ways. When we learn to accept what is we gain profound compassion for ourselves and others.

How to do less controlling and more accepting? First its about developing the awareness of when we are trying to control situations.  Sometimes you can recognize these areas as areas of great frustration in our lives. Notice why we feel frustrated and see if it is because we are trying to control a situation or not accept something. Then let’s meet ourselves with compassion. It is likely that the controlling is due to wanting to enhance the situation, our ourselves and others. The desire is in the right place, so let’s REWARD ourselves for caring and thinking these great thoughts. Next comes the recognition that in fact some people or situations can’t be changed. True changing of self really needs to come from within.  Sometimes for whatever reason we or others are dealt certain cards in life that cannot be changed no matter how hard we try. With this awareness, great patience and compassion we can start to learn how to accept.  Acceptance then becomes a practice.

In meditation, we often find ourselves trying to control our breath.  Practicing just noticing the breath is yet a another tool to learn how to accept what is.

All this talk about acceptance and change reminds me of the wonderful serenity prayer written by Reinhold Niebuhr. Introduced to it by my Savta, I have always loved it.

G-d grant us the ability to change the things we can, accept the things we can’t and the wisdom to know the difference.

So let’s embrace acceptance.  When we do, maybe that serenity is closer than we think.

 

 

Shana Tova to All!

Wishing everyone a mindful year filled with joyous discovery and self growth!

Thinking about buying fruits and vegetables for the holidays?    Check out this Restartwell video on how to pick the best produce!

 

This Side of the Fence

When we get overwhelmed by our issues we may develop a wish to walk on over and hang out on the nicely manicured lawn across the street rather than face our own weeds. We wish our lives looked different and problem free. And while we all have a legitimate right to want good things and happy times, sometimes examining our own weeds can make for a truly great looking lawn.

When we look at our own weeds, two things happen. We start to realize that we can see our difficult situation in new ways. Perhaps we were stuck thinking about things in one way but when we revisit our situation we realize it isn’t as dismal as it seemed. We can start to see our painful issues in a new light. Even in situations that we can’t change, by staring at the situation instead of running away we learn the extent of our bravery and strength.

Through an examination of our own lawns we can also realize that the weeds are there but amidst a huge lawn filled with greenery. Finding what to appreciate in our own lives and celebrating what we do have can be another wonderful result of looking at our own lawns.

We can’t take out our weeds if we are not on our own lawns. Sometimes the weeds are super pesky and do require a lot of effort, and there will even be some weeds that we can’t pull out. But let’s keep at our own lawn, the more we try at it, the greener it gets.

What do you do to stay fit?